When Insults had Class

Discussion in 'Member News and Views' started by dweiss17, Sep 6, 2015.

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  1. dweiss17

    dweiss17 Registered User
    Old Timer NAWCC Member

    Aug 1, 2006
    Retired from Graphic Arts
    Philadelphia, PA
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    #1 dweiss17, Sep 6, 2015
    Last edited: Sep 6, 2015

    Tomorrow is Labor Day...I'll do the same like I did last Labor Day...NOTHING!

    However, I submit this little formula for great insults.

    It's called..."when insults had class."

    These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words

    A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable dise

    "That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress.".

    "He had delusions of adequacy."

    - Walter Ker

    "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.".

    - Winston Churchill.

    "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure."

    - Clarence Darrow.

    "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary."

    - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).

    "Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it.".

    - Moses Hadas.

    "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.".

    - Mark Twain.

    "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends."

    - Oscar Wild

    "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend, if you have one."

    - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchil

    "Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second .... if there is one.".

    - Winston Churchill, in response.

    "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here.".

    - Stephen Bishop.

    "He is a self-made man and worships his creator.".

    - John Bright.

    "I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial.".

    - Irvin S. Cobb.

    "He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others.".

    - Samuel Johnson.

    "He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up."

    - Paul Keating.

    "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily.".

    - Charles, Count Talleyrand

    "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him.".

    - Forrest Tucker.

    "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?"

    - Mark Twain.

    "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork."

    - Mae West.

    "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go."

    - Oscar Wilde

    "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination."

    - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)

    "He has Van Gogh's ear for music.".

    - Billy Wilder

    "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But I'm afraid this wasn't it.".

    - Groucho Marx.

  2. Steven Thornberry

    Steven Thornberry User Administrator
    NAWCC Member

    Jan 15, 2004
    Ne’er do well
    Here and there
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    Haven't across a Reference to Moses Hadas almost 40 years. Better to do A. E. Housman.
  3. ClipClock

    ClipClock Registered User

    Jun 20, 2013
    Run small business manufacturing equestrian sector
    Kent, UK
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    Some of those are brilliant, thanks for posting :)
  4. shutterbug

    shutterbug Moderator
    NAWCC Member

    Oct 19, 2005
    Self employed interpreter/clock repairer
    North Carolina
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    Had to smile at the well thought out jabs :)
  5. leghorn

    leghorn Registered User
    NAWCC Member

    May 3, 2003
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    I just ran across your post. The quotes are amazing. I love every one of them. How are things in Northeast Philly, still living around North East public H.S.?

    Haven't heard from you since the old ### Chapter. I live in the North West part of Philly. Roxborough to be exact. Have stayed in touch with some of the old ### members, Tom Huber Jim hanney Fred Hansen, etc. Hey just thought I would say Hi.

    I belong to Chapter 1 now.

    Frank Juchniewicz (leghorn), on the messageboard.
  6. doug sinclair

    doug sinclair Registered User

    Aug 27, 2000
    Calgary, Alberta
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    Winston Churchill at a party:

    "Madam, you are ugly. Tomorrow I shall be sober and you will still be ugly!"

    Yogi Berra:

    1. "It's like deja vu all over again."
    2. "We made too many wrong mistakes."
    3. "You can observe a lot just by watching."
    4. "A nickel ain't worth a dime anymore."
    5. "He hits from both sides of the plate. He's amphibious."
  7. Randy Beckett

    Randy Beckett Registered User
    NAWCC Member

    May 23, 2012
    33 yr. employee of American Electric Power Company
    Mt. Pleasant, Tx
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    #7 Randy Beckett, Sep 9, 2015
    Last edited: Sep 9, 2015
    Winston Churchill and Lady Astor:

    Lady Astor - "Winston, if you were my husband, I would put poison in your tea."

    Churchill - "Nancy, if I were your husband, I would drink it."

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